Oct 23, 2017 Homesick
Porter my six year old was born tender and sentimental. He often turns to me in moments of love or sadness and says to me with tear brimmed eyes, “Mom does that make you feel like crying?” To which I always say, “Yes.” Then his eyes spill over and he covers them with his hands and says, “Me too.”
This scene has played out so many times I couldn’t count them. I am so proud of his vulnerability. So honored that he opens up to me.
I knew that out of all of us he would be the one to experience homesickness. He is conscious of who he wants to have in his life. He has a large family of grandparents, aunts/uncles, and cousins that he feels close to. So when he turned to me yesterday at a restaurant with tear brimmed eyes and asked, “Can we go home for Halloween? I’d really hate to miss trick-or-treating. Then we could continue on our trip around the world.” I knew homesickness had hit.
As a parent it’s hard to explain how your child’s emotions can tug at you. It hurts you. You want to make their discomfort go away, even if you know that it’s healthy and needed. It seems the first five years have so much to do with how the next eighty will turn out. My first reaction was to say OK we are done. We can go home. I don’t want you to feel like this.
I have to ankowledege what he is going through. I need him to know that he is seen. I decided to explain to him how I was feeling; that I don’t feel homesick in the same way he does. Because my home is with him, his siblings, and his dad and they are all with me. So my home is always with me. None the less I am trying to make the foreign familiar to him and I am trying to figure out how to navigate his nostalgia so, I told him that they do trick or treating in Frankfurt! I hope that’s true! If not we will be doing it anyways I guess.